Never Late

Oh dad, so many times over the last year I felt God's hand on my life so firmly it can only be described as Divine. When I should have felt anger I felt contentment, when I should have felt fear I was at peace, when I should have felt bitterness I was overwhelmed with His goodness. It sounds strange to say but I am eternally grateful for these trials because I can confidentially say that my Hope, my Peace, and my Joy is grounded in Jesus Christ. And there is no way to know that until it is put to the fire. It brought James 1:2-5 to a whole new light for me. 

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

I feel like I could stop there, but the reason I wanted to write to you, was to share that God so graciously blessed us with another little one. To be honest I was so incredibly surprised when I saw those two lines. My body was still "off" and I really thought it would be quite a few more months of trying, if we were able to get pregnant at all. I took the test, set it on the back of the toilet and sat there waiting for it to develop with my back turned and heart racing. I picked it up, fully expecting yet another negative and then my heart stopped as I realized that there was a second line screaming of God's faithfulness back at me. I pretty much instantaneously burst into tears and sobbed for a few minutes while a rush of gratitude washed over me. I couldn't even think of a fun way to tell Bryan because I was just too excited so I pulled out his Dad(7) shirt that I bought him last fall and said, "Do you want to wear this to work?" His face beamed with joy and we both thanked the Lord for this new life. I was so apprehensive to get excited because I didn't want to get attached and then heartbroken again. But it's silly to think that you won't get attached because the moment you see those two lines your heart dreams of the future. I immediately got into the dr to start the medication I needed to have a healthy pregnancy. So far everything has gone really well and I have been wonderfully sick and flat on my back tired. We told the kids over a family lunch to Raising Canes and they were all excited but I could tell were nervous about getting their hopes up again. We are almost out of the first trimester and baby is moving and growing more and more every day. Now the great debate is if the kids will get to name the baby or if mommy will win. Their choices are very different than mine and it's 6 against 1. haha 

To close I wanted to share a song that resonates so deeply with me. It's called Yes I will and I love the chorus that says, "In the waiting the same God who's never late is working all things out, is working all things out." This baby is not late. This little life is coming exactly when he/she is supposed to and God worked all of out it according to His perfect plan. We thank Him and praise Him for His goodness to us in allowing us to love this little one for however long he/she is in our care. We love you and miss you dearly and the hole that you left is felt daily, yet filled with God's grace.

Your Favorite Second Born,

Carley